God is doing a crazy thing in my heart. I am continuously questioning things and trying to understand why I believe what I do. He's been giving me a REAL love for people. A love so encompassed with grace it scares and shocks even me. Sure I may not understand, but I know that this compassion that has been birthed in me is there for a reason.
I have a feeling that God is calling me to something different, something greater. I can't put my finger on it but I know that people are going to be angry with my actions. I'm going to be critisized and even marginalized by the church itself. As a Vanguard student I'm taught to be innovative, that's what my calling as a pastor is too. An innovative ministry. What the heck does that look like?!?!?! I guess I wont know until I get there. I think it starts with truly loving the person, regardless of the sin, regardless of my preconceived ideas of who and what they are. The healthy people don't need a doctor...the sick do....ha ha....that's funny....I've always wanted to be called "Dr Sasha Hale" maybe it won't be official....but maybe indirectly God is calling me to be a doctor to the lost....to introduce to them the hope that I've found, and they too can find, in Jesus....to help heal their beaten bodies and broken hearts....wow....that just changed my life.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Saturday, July 22, 2006
My grandpa was rushed to the hospital at 11pm last night......they didn't think that he was going to make it. My heart is breaking. The doctors dont know what's wrong. I want to be able to fix him...and love him....and ride on the tractor like we did when I was little. I want all of those moments back.....I feel as though I have to cling so desperatly to them because if I don't they will fade away. He was released, praise God, but they still don't know what is wrong. He hugged me today....he squeezed me sooo tight....I didnt want to let go...I didnt want to cry.....so many things that I didnt want to do....and in the end I let go, told him that I loved him, and walked away not knowing if I would ever see him again. My heart is in pieces....he needs Jesus soooo much. If you have the time could you take a moment to pray for him as you read this.....that would mean the world to me....
Thursday, July 20, 2006
here's a peek at my first sermon
So I have to preach...for the very first time on a sunday morning...in Edam Saskatchewan...truthfully I dont even know where that is and in the middle of the circumstances that I'm having to face it's funny how my own sermon is becoming a lesson to me.
See I am talking about this guy named Jeremiah. I love this prophet. Reading through the writings I see glimpses of a man who's only passion was to follow God no matter what was placed before him. He was asked to give some pretty harsh judgements upon the people of Israel whom he loved dearly. Even in the darkest hour this man obeyed God. He followed through...pronounced the irreversable judgment by smashing a clay jar and then he was loved by all and everybody wanted to be his friend.....um...no.
See in chapter 19 Jeremiah obeys what God tells him to do. He follows that which he is called to and in chapter 20 we see a man broken, literally beaten, and he is left all alone. Jeremiah was a simple man, called by God, to do extraordinary things, just like you and I. In chapter 1 of the book of Jeremiah God called Jeremiah to be a prophet to the nation of Israel. He questioned God's motives and couldn't understand why God would want just a simple boy. God promised to stand by him, through all that he was called to and provide for him everything needed. So Jeremiah accepted this call. This is important. He had to let go of every dream, every desire, every hope that he personally had for his life, and accept the calling that God had for him. The calling that God had for him ruined the person of Jeremiah and then began to mold him into the person that God had created him to be.
The place where we find Jeremiah in chapter 20 is far from the place where he was when he recieved his call. He had obeyed everything that God had said. He embraced this call and he is left with nothing. It is here where we see the rawness experessed in following God. We see the pain of a man who loves God and loves his people, yet feels that he is rejected by both. Jeremiah therefore comes to the conclusion that he will reject this call and turn the other way. But he can't. His calling burns so deep in his heart. He can not escape it. It is as though he is saying Lord, I gave into your calling, I followed Your ways, I submitted to You. Now everyone laughs at me. If I try to stop Your word burns in my heart. It bothers me day and night and captures me and will not let me go!
How often do we feel like Jeremiah? We feel as though we have given up everything to answer to the will of God in our lives and it feels as though we are left alone, worse then what we would have been if we had rejected the call. Often we feel hopeless and ask the question, Why? The important thing here is not that Jeremiah is questioning the call of God on his life, and it is not even that he is considering quitting, but it is in the way that he ultimately responds that is key to being a true follower of God.
In verses 11 through 13 see a change in mood and are a prayer for Gods protection and vindication. When he is overwhelmed with this constant opposition Jeremiahs only resort is a rock-bottom affirmation of his faith. It is in this where he has no choice but to stand on the promises that God had given to him in the past and the faithful One that he has come to know Yahweh to be.
Many Christians in todays society expect that following God and His will for their lives is an easy task. Some people who come to know Jesus feel like nothing could ever stop them or hinder their obedience to the call that God has on his/her life. Many expect the Christian walk to be easy with only minor bumps and scraps along the way, however we see that this is not the case through Jeremiahs example. Jeremiah was a prophet, chosen and called by God. Some would suggest that this very fact would protect him from all worries and troubles that would come his way, however this was not the case.
Jeremiah himself never saw one piece of fruit within his time in ministry. Even most of us see some sort of fruit from the things that we do for God at some point in our lives, but Jeremiah saw nothing. From his example we can learn that sometimes all that we have is to cling to what God has called us to and the hope that God has given to us. Even Jeremiah questioned his existence. He asked the big why questions that many of us can be stuck in. What is important is that we rise up over the hardships placed in front of us despite the circumstances and embrace our call regardless of what we see and understand things to be. When God calls us we must follow Him. Every desire and dream that we ever had is replaced with Gods will. He ruins us and it may not bring about the lifestyle that we had expected, but in following Jeremiahs example we must continue on Gods path and trust that His will is far greater then anything that we could ever want for ourselves.
See I am talking about this guy named Jeremiah. I love this prophet. Reading through the writings I see glimpses of a man who's only passion was to follow God no matter what was placed before him. He was asked to give some pretty harsh judgements upon the people of Israel whom he loved dearly. Even in the darkest hour this man obeyed God. He followed through...pronounced the irreversable judgment by smashing a clay jar and then he was loved by all and everybody wanted to be his friend.....um...no.
See in chapter 19 Jeremiah obeys what God tells him to do. He follows that which he is called to and in chapter 20 we see a man broken, literally beaten, and he is left all alone. Jeremiah was a simple man, called by God, to do extraordinary things, just like you and I. In chapter 1 of the book of Jeremiah God called Jeremiah to be a prophet to the nation of Israel. He questioned God's motives and couldn't understand why God would want just a simple boy. God promised to stand by him, through all that he was called to and provide for him everything needed. So Jeremiah accepted this call. This is important. He had to let go of every dream, every desire, every hope that he personally had for his life, and accept the calling that God had for him. The calling that God had for him ruined the person of Jeremiah and then began to mold him into the person that God had created him to be.
The place where we find Jeremiah in chapter 20 is far from the place where he was when he recieved his call. He had obeyed everything that God had said. He embraced this call and he is left with nothing. It is here where we see the rawness experessed in following God. We see the pain of a man who loves God and loves his people, yet feels that he is rejected by both. Jeremiah therefore comes to the conclusion that he will reject this call and turn the other way. But he can't. His calling burns so deep in his heart. He can not escape it. It is as though he is saying Lord, I gave into your calling, I followed Your ways, I submitted to You. Now everyone laughs at me. If I try to stop Your word burns in my heart. It bothers me day and night and captures me and will not let me go!
How often do we feel like Jeremiah? We feel as though we have given up everything to answer to the will of God in our lives and it feels as though we are left alone, worse then what we would have been if we had rejected the call. Often we feel hopeless and ask the question, Why? The important thing here is not that Jeremiah is questioning the call of God on his life, and it is not even that he is considering quitting, but it is in the way that he ultimately responds that is key to being a true follower of God.
In verses 11 through 13 see a change in mood and are a prayer for Gods protection and vindication. When he is overwhelmed with this constant opposition Jeremiahs only resort is a rock-bottom affirmation of his faith. It is in this where he has no choice but to stand on the promises that God had given to him in the past and the faithful One that he has come to know Yahweh to be.
Many Christians in todays society expect that following God and His will for their lives is an easy task. Some people who come to know Jesus feel like nothing could ever stop them or hinder their obedience to the call that God has on his/her life. Many expect the Christian walk to be easy with only minor bumps and scraps along the way, however we see that this is not the case through Jeremiahs example. Jeremiah was a prophet, chosen and called by God. Some would suggest that this very fact would protect him from all worries and troubles that would come his way, however this was not the case.
Jeremiah himself never saw one piece of fruit within his time in ministry. Even most of us see some sort of fruit from the things that we do for God at some point in our lives, but Jeremiah saw nothing. From his example we can learn that sometimes all that we have is to cling to what God has called us to and the hope that God has given to us. Even Jeremiah questioned his existence. He asked the big why questions that many of us can be stuck in. What is important is that we rise up over the hardships placed in front of us despite the circumstances and embrace our call regardless of what we see and understand things to be. When God calls us we must follow Him. Every desire and dream that we ever had is replaced with Gods will. He ruins us and it may not bring about the lifestyle that we had expected, but in following Jeremiahs example we must continue on Gods path and trust that His will is far greater then anything that we could ever want for ourselves.
Monday, July 17, 2006
had the time of my life!
I just got back from The Calgary Stampede where my friends parents took me to see Third Day, Starfield, and Chris Tomlin in concert. I was blessed sooo much by that family this weekend. It was good to be reminded of what family is and what love really is as well. They are an amazing example of what it means to be transformed by Christ and I look up to them soo much. 
Well I'd be lying if I even considered to think for just a second that the concert was bad....it was amazing! Starfield opened it up! I've known these guys for 5 years now and they are super amazing. As soon as Jon saw me he gave me a hug and Tim and I talked for awhile about life in Lloyd...it was just really such an amazing step for them to be singing as an opening act for Third Day they were shocked and humbled but they had a great performance.
Chris Tomlin played 2nd and the annointing that flowed off of that man was incredible. I stood there amazed by his ability to welcome the presence of God into that place and as he stood he genuinly worshipped God...it was amazing. Hali and I joked because...well having front row tickets you see things that ppl at the back dont see...and well lets just say that we consider Chris to have anointed spit..ha ha.
By the time Thrid Day stepped on stage I was in shock..almost literally. We were gonna call on Jon (from Starfield) to give me mouth to mouth...I MEAN I WOULD NEVER DO THAT! But Third Day was AMAZGIN as well! Mac Powell kept smiling at me. It's cool cuz he payed attention to his fans and stuff it was really amazing. I got a pick from him too. That was pretty cool. When I get better picks I'll post them. But ya... it was amazing. But now I need to sleep!
Well I'd be lying if I even considered to think for just a second that the concert was bad....it was amazing! Starfield opened it up! I've known these guys for 5 years now and they are super amazing. As soon as Jon saw me he gave me a hug and Tim and I talked for awhile about life in Lloyd...it was just really such an amazing step for them to be singing as an opening act for Third Day they were shocked and humbled but they had a great performance.
Chris Tomlin played 2nd and the annointing that flowed off of that man was incredible. I stood there amazed by his ability to welcome the presence of God into that place and as he stood he genuinly worshipped God...it was amazing. Hali and I joked because...well having front row tickets you see things that ppl at the back dont see...and well lets just say that we consider Chris to have anointed spit..ha ha.
By the time Thrid Day stepped on stage I was in shock..almost literally. We were gonna call on Jon (from Starfield) to give me mouth to mouth...I MEAN I WOULD NEVER DO THAT! But Third Day was AMAZGIN as well! Mac Powell kept smiling at me. It's cool cuz he payed attention to his fans and stuff it was really amazing. I got a pick from him too. That was pretty cool. When I get better picks I'll post them. But ya... it was amazing. But now I need to sleep!
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Missing Edmonton
I miss walking these paths at night under the stars.....and I miss the people who I usually go to see it with even more.....47 days
Waiting...in the arms of Jesus
Prayer is the discipline by which God gives us the ability to wait. To persevere. To dream again. And to trust. ~Angela Thomas
It's funny how I found this quote just after talking to a friend about how to handle things when God asks you to wait. It doesn't matter the circumstance, when God asks me to wait I am so ADD I either press forward with disregard, or sit around bitter toward God for ever asking me to have to do such a thing. But, lately it's been different. Not because I have become "Super Sasha" and am able to obey every command that God gives me, but it has become more easily bearable through prayer. By seeking Him and His purposes for my life, by talking to my Saviour about the things He has in store, I come to understand that His ways are far higher then I may ever comprehend, but His purposes are perfect.
Angela Thomas goes on to say that "Prayer is the means by which we continually place ourselves in the arms of God." Sure God may tell us to do things that may seem unbearable but it is in His arms where we find refuge and peace. It is a place where we can dream dreams that are far bigger then we could ever imagine for ourselves. In the arms of our Dad, we can stand firm on the fact that He will never leave us nor forsake us, and it is through those promises that we can understand that if He asks us to do the "impossible" it's because He's standing there beside us, holding our hands, walking us down the aisle of life. It's in Him where I know that I can trust and lean not on my own understanding....cuz He's got my back...
So....through prayer....and giving up the plans that I have for my life...waiting doesn't seem so bad and I can trust that it will be worth it in the end.
It's funny how I found this quote just after talking to a friend about how to handle things when God asks you to wait. It doesn't matter the circumstance, when God asks me to wait I am so ADD I either press forward with disregard, or sit around bitter toward God for ever asking me to have to do such a thing. But, lately it's been different. Not because I have become "Super Sasha" and am able to obey every command that God gives me, but it has become more easily bearable through prayer. By seeking Him and His purposes for my life, by talking to my Saviour about the things He has in store, I come to understand that His ways are far higher then I may ever comprehend, but His purposes are perfect.
Angela Thomas goes on to say that "Prayer is the means by which we continually place ourselves in the arms of God." Sure God may tell us to do things that may seem unbearable but it is in His arms where we find refuge and peace. It is a place where we can dream dreams that are far bigger then we could ever imagine for ourselves. In the arms of our Dad, we can stand firm on the fact that He will never leave us nor forsake us, and it is through those promises that we can understand that if He asks us to do the "impossible" it's because He's standing there beside us, holding our hands, walking us down the aisle of life. It's in Him where I know that I can trust and lean not on my own understanding....cuz He's got my back...
So....through prayer....and giving up the plans that I have for my life...waiting doesn't seem so bad and I can trust that it will be worth it in the end.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
AHHH!!!!
So my friend's parents just invited me to go with their family to the Third Day, Chris Tomlin, Starfield concert in Calgary for Stampede weekend........crazy stuff.....it gets crazier.....THEY HAVE FRONT ROW CENTRE TICKETS!!!!! and my friend actually won't be there...so it's just me hanging out w/ her family for the entire weekend!! The funnier thing was about 3 weeks back I had this dream where I was with her mom and we were shopping in all these really expensive stores and stuff....and I was like when will that ever happen?!??! Well......ya....so let's just say...I'm blessed...it's been a really amazing day....n
ot just because of that...I've been blessed by so many people today I can't even count.....
And one of my best friends/ old roomies got engaged this past weekend.... March 10th 2007 is the day. I'm sooooo happy for her..... 3 down only 3 more to go....
My Jamaican Brother is also getting married.......we never thought the day would come......crazy crazy I say...I can't believe it!!!!
ot just because of that...I've been blessed by so many people today I can't even count.....And one of my best friends/ old roomies got engaged this past weekend.... March 10th 2007 is the day. I'm sooooo happy for her..... 3 down only 3 more to go....
My Jamaican Brother is also getting married.......we never thought the day would come......crazy crazy I say...I can't believe it!!!!
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