Well today has been such a crazy day. Last night I babysat for my youth pastors and their kids were funny and cute....and then they wouldnt sleep!!! EEEK! Jacob wouldnt sleep unless I was holding him....and Emma kept waking up and SCREAMING for her mommy....it was crazy and then in my attempts to make Jacob sleep I tried to feed him and that didnt work....and then I tried to change his diaper and that didnt work (I just found out later this afternoon that I had put his diaper on backwards...SOOOO funny...but it was dark and he was crying...ya...that's my excuse!!) But see...it was all worth it cuz Kenny and Kelly anne hadnt been out by themselves in such a long time....I use my lonliness to bless others...heck if I love their children I might as well look after them....so as Kelly was drivin me home she said that her and Kenny had bought me groceries.....it seems as though the world doesnt think I eat now that I'm interning.....but I was blessed...here I try to bless them and they bless me!!!

Today I've been able to really open up w/ the youth...and a couple of them have opened up to me telling me about thier home lives and the problems with their parents and the brokenness that they are facing.....some have told me their deep secrets....I'm telling you I'm being blessed left and right....just to be able to listen to them and let them know that somebody cares...it's worth all the stress and homework in the world.....it's like this is what all the hard work I've done these past 4 yrs has paid off to accomplish....it's all sooo worth it to make a difference for God in the lives of these kids.....and it's also amazing to see the hand of God in my life and the use of things that that I have gone through in order for me to help these kids out and relate to them in a way that they might think nobody can....I'm in awe

I dont ever want to loose the thankfullness that's developing in my heart and the sense of God that is so prominant in all areas of my life....I dont ever want to loose this......never.