My heart hurts. I'm angry. I'm sad. I want to run, scream, cry. I hate being at points like these. Where I don't know where to go, what to do, what to say or how to be. I'm a big bundle of frustration. I don't want to be where I am and I'm scared of where I want to be. How stupid. I often feel like I never get specific direction to what I'm suppose to do. Every body has ideas and opinions. It's frustrating, but also reassuring because I know that I'm not in this alone and that you too struggle with some of the same things. I feel ridiculous as I type this. Ashamed. I should be happy with where I am. Happy with how far I've come, but I'm in fact frustrated with myself for not being farther, not understanding more.
I'm a mess. Blah.
1 comment:
There's a positive side to that. Not knowing is freedom. I've felt that way for about 10 years now, but I have found freedom in knowing the steps are my choice, and I don't have to end up somewhere I don't want to be, again. I pray for peace for you.
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